Conversations in the Dark

8:30 p.m.
Thursday night
Lights out
Tucked in Bed

9 year old T. (dejectedly):  "Mom, I don't think I am a good Christian."

Me:  "Why do you say that, T.?"

T: "Because I don't read the Bible so much in my free time."

Me:  "Well, you can change that anytime, honey.  I'll tell you what I try to do and you can see if that would help."

T:  "O.k."

Me:  "I try to get up a little bit before I have to start getting ready for the day and spend some time with the Lord.  I pray a little, read a little from the Bible and sing a worship song."

T:  "I never remember to do that."

Me:  "If you do it enough times, you will remember."

T:  "Oh, like a habit?"

Me:  "Yes, exactly."

A lull in the conversation gives Him time to remind me.

Me:  "T?"

T:  Yes, mom."

Me:  "I'm afraid I'm not a good Christian either."

T:  "Why?"

Me:  "Well, because no one is.  No one can be good without God.  That's why Jesus died for us."

T:  "Oh, yeah."

Me:  "He knows we will fail and fall short.  And He loves us anyway- that's what grace is.  He is not looking for a certain amount of time we spend reading the Bible or praying.  He looks at our hearts.  If we love Him, He knows that."

T.:  "Oh.  Can we do devotionals in the morning like we used to?"

Me (wincing inside):  "Yes, we can."

T.:  " I know where the book is."

Me:  "O.k., we'll get back to it again, then."

T:  "O.k.  Good night, Mom."

Two days before this conversation took place, I read this post by Joy at Memoria Arts.   God prepared me for this teachable moment with my son as I had been pondering this theme since I read that post of Joy's.  I'm still learning these things, are you?  There is no formula to being a good Christian. There is only the journey of following Him.  A journey that is different from anyone else's.  A journey of His design marked by low valleys, rigorous climbs and indescribable summits.  I pray I can teach my children this as they grow.  That they will throw off man's expectations for their Christianity and pursue Jesus down the path He has marked for them.