Spilled Milk (or Water, Actually)

"And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord."  Ephesians 6:4

No, I'm not a father, but I'm pretty sure that does not let me off the hook with this one.  The verse popped up in my News Feed on Facebook this morning.  

Right after I yelled at my poor oldest boy for spilling a glass of water all over the homeschool table and the pile of paperwork that I am working through today, even as he was already trying to mop up the mess.


*Sigh*  


I was thankful for His reminder.  It helped me to quickly repent and ask for forgiveness.  While He was quick to forgive, my boy took a little longer.  I understood why, I was out of line.  So I gave him the time and space he needed and before long we reconciled. 


The papers dried quickly, but the wound to his heart might take longer.  

Lord, give me grace to raise my children with patience and gentleness.  Help me to see what is truly important in each moment and to respond to that.  Give me self-control to push down frustration and anger and to respond with the love and grace You show me.  In Jesus' name, amen.


***It's been a long time since I last posted here!  Life as a homeschooling mama is busy and full.  I miss this space, but seldom have time to post here.  I do update our homeschooling blog fairly regularly, though, and I'd love to see you there: Our Great Homeschool Experiment***

Faithful Over a Few Things

His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’   Matthew 25: 21

This Sunday, our dear pastor and his lovely wife and son had some much deserved R & R.  A brother from the fellowship delivered the message on Sunday.  He taught on the Parable of the Talents from Matthew 25.   It was a message I needed to hear.


Ever since we decided to homeschool, I purposed to put aside all my ministry roles outside of the home so that I could focus on homeschooling.  For a season, I decided, I would pour all my gifts into my family and home.  This decision was practical.  It made sense.  The only problem was that it just never felt right.   


As wives and mothers, are our primary callings in the home?  Yes!  However, there are other needs (both within and outside of the Body of Christ) that each one of us may also be called to meet.  I've always been convicted that we can never convince our families and neighbors of God's goodness and love if we never step back from our own (many) responsibilities as wife and mother to show them His love.  I believe in stepping away to minister to others, we not only bless those who are outside our home but those inside it as well.  It reminds our family- especially our children- that there are times when our own desires must be put aside for the needs of others.  


God gave us our gifts to be a blessing.  When we use them, it should not be a burden but a joy.  The servants in this passage were entrusted with a gift from the master.  When he returned to settle accounts with each, he expected that they had been not simply good stewards of the gift, protecting it from destruction.  He expected that each had used the gift to bear fruit.  It was only in those cases that the master  uttered the words we all long to hear: "Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things.  Enter into the joy of your lord."  


I am not a preacher or a prophet.  I'm not an evangelist or a teacher.  I do however have a gift from the Lord.  He has given me the analytical and organizational skills of administration.  I can take what might seem like a dry and daunting task to others and break it into small, manageable parts and bring order to a situation.  I have used my gift as secretary of our church, an event coordinator for our Women's Ministry, to organize rides and other help for a friend in need.  Please know that I am not bringing glory to myself at all- God has entrusted me with this gift of administration and I want to use it to bring glory to Him alone!  


Now that we are homeschooling, do I need to step back from some of these roles to pour my time and energy into this calling?  Yes!  Are there ways that I can still use my gift to bless others outside the home as well?  Yes!  God confirmed this to me in Sunday's message.  There are opportunities to minister with my gift that He is bringing to me.  When I know He is calling me outside the home to use my gift, I must follow.  


I have heard Him already.  It is a little thing He asking.  I want to be faithful over it.  

Linking up to Michelle's Hear it on Sunday, Use it on Monday meme:

  

A Gift from His Heart

*Forgive me if you subscribe to both of my blogs, you will see this post twice today.  I wrote it for my new homeschooling blog but I realized it was appropriate to post here, too, as the content is mostly about how God is speaking to me in this season.*

As our book club was drawing to a close last Saturday morning, my sweet friend handed me a book entitled Homeschool Supermom...NOT!  When Grace Meets Homeschooling by Susan Kemmerer.  She said it was a gift (along with an iPhone arm band thingy I wanted for the Couch to 5 K madness she has gotten me wrapped up in, but that's another post entirely.)  I thought it was such a kind gesture- don't you love it when you get a tangible blessing reminding you that someone is thinking of you?

Thursday afternoon, as the kids swam away the afternoon, I sat on our back patio and read Chapter 1 of Homeschool Supermom.  And I quickly realized that the book was not just a gift from my friend's heart to mine but one that was also straight from His heart!  Right from those first few pages, I could see that God was going to use this book to speak to me about several different thoughts/concerns I've been mulling over as of late.

Let me back up to Wednesday and explain.  Wednesday was a bad day here.  A terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.  I'll spare you the details but by lunchtime I had yelled so much my voice was hoarse and the kids were wide eyed with alarm.  By bedtime, I was ready to join in with the chorus of tears from my overtired kids.  Late Wednesday night, lying awake in bed while the rest of the family slumbered, all I could think was "what was I thinking?  How can I homeschool these children?  Is it too late to call the school and get them signed up for next year?  But what about all the money we've spent on homeschool materials?"  Sleep was slow in coming, needless to say.

Today I read this in Homeschool Supermom:

"If you're feeling overwhelmed, discouraged, ashamed, and burnt out, keep this in mind: putting your kids back in school or hiring a maid might make life easier- for a time- but it will not ultimately make you happier or more righteous before God, nor will it accomplish the changes in your life and family that you really desire... Only a heart focused on Jesus and what He accomplished on the cross on our behalf will ever experience true, lasting joy- even when the house is a wreck and school remains undone."

That encouragement was like water to a dry soul.  And there was plenty more encouragement and wisdom sprinkled throughout the short chapter. 

And speaking of my dry soul, that leads me to the next reason I love this book already.  Each chapter ends with questions to ponder and scriptures on which to meditate.  Since summer began, bringing with it a new routine, my morning prayer/scripture time has become less regular and somewhat stale.  Now I'm planning on using this feature of Homeschool Supermom in my morning Quiet Time and I am already feel excited about it again!

The last wonderful nugget I took away from Chapter 1 was actually a confirmation of concepts  God has been teaching me lately.  Remember that book club I mentioned at the start of this post?  We had been reading and discussing Authentic Relationships: Discover the Lost Art of One Anothering by Wayne Jacobsen and Clay Jacobsen.  One of the themes we discussed was how to be genuine, authentic, transparent in friendships- to allow people to see beyond the image into our real selves.  A favorite quote from this book:

"Our fear of letting people see beyond the image we want to project denies us the friendships for which we hunger."  Authentic Relationships

 And from Homeschool Supermom:

"...behind closed doors, there lurks a secret.  There's another side we seldom let anyone see. It's our messy homes and messy lives being worked out in the messy process of sanctification.  It's called 'our humanity.'"

I was reminded this afternoon, that I want to be genuine and real.  So many sweet friends have encouraged me already in this homeschool journey- sharing how they wish they could do it and how wonderful they think I am for doing this thing called homeschooling.  But the truth is, I am not all that wonderful.  I am not a Supermom by any stretch of the imagination.  Exhibit A- Wednesday at my house.  I'm simply a mom who feels led to give this homeschooling thing a try- willing to offer up my weaknesses as well as my gifts to God and see what He makes of it all.  If we continue on this homeschool journey after a year, it will be only by His grace.  If our journey ends after one year at home, that too then will be only by His grace. 

Our Great Homeschool Experiment

Several friends and family have asked us to keep them up to date on our year of homeschooling, which I've affectionately come to refer to as Our Great Homeschool Experiment :)  I decided to start a separate blog to document our experiences with homeschooling. I'll probably still post some on homeschooling here as it will be such a big part of my life in the next year but I will leave the nitty gritty details of the journey over on the new blog.  I'd love for your to follow our journey there so pop on over to Our Great Homeschool Adventure and drop a comment to let me know if you do!